To Keep in Mind for Fall

Style.com's Top 10 must-haves for this coming fall are as follows (my reactions in italics):

Um... okay.

1. Flares
Really? I hate flares. They don't look good on just anyone, and more often than not, you just look like a pre-teen or someone lost in the 70s. I think I just have a bad association with flares... they remind me of cheap ass stores like DEB. Bleh!

2. Velvet
I love velvet, but I've come to the realization that you have to be careful or you'll end up looking like a pimp. Like Huggy Bear or something.

3. A camel coat
I can't think of anything more potentially boring than a camel coat, but that plain ass color allows a garment's shape to take precedence. So as long as it's not plain in color and in style, you'll be all right.

4. A shearling
YES, LORD! I need a shearling coat. Burberry, Balmain (I think it was Balmain), and others have done shearling these past few seasons (at least the most recent one). Get on this, ASAP.

5. Statement gloves
The ones that come to mind were ones by Givenchy, I believe. Black, with tons of studs. You probably saw them online somewhere.

6. A fur bag
Why in the hell would you need a fur bag?

7.Short, cuffed jeans
Okay, I'll give them this. Short jeans are cool... very A.Hepburn (did she even wear jeans?).

8. A cropped sweater
Yes, yes, yes! Just don't forget to wear layers, or you'll catch pneumonia of the bellybutton.

9. A longer skirt
...Maybe a little reactionary, but worthwhile. A longer skirt is, sometimes, a bolder look than a mini. I like this look the most when it's kind of "austere Amish". Picture this, a black hat a la Demeulemeester/Whodini, a jersey maxi skirt, black leather jacket, and a loose white tank tucked in. Not something I would wear, but a look I greatly enjoy and appreciate.

10. A double-breasted jacket
Yeah... I really don't know about this. There's nothing wrong with double-breasted jackets, but as a "must have"? I don't know.